| |
| |
|
Coaching Information |
|
|
|
Become More Self-Confident
Signs of Self-Confidence Let's explore the meaning of self-confidence by taking a quiz. Read the list of statements below and check which ones, in your opinion, are signs of self-confidence. 1. Admitting when you are wrong. 2. Being flexible when change is needed. 3. Talking about your accomplishments. 4. Describing negative events in positive terms. For example, "We didn't make our target, but we sure learned a lot." 5. Dressing to please yourself without worrying what others will think. 6. Using a strong handshake. 7. Using casual language in an effort to avoid sounding too "corporate." For example, "You guys did a cool thing." 8. Speaking very fast. 9. Smiling often. 10. Learning new skills. 11. Putting yourself down in order to sound humble. Compare your answers to those on the bottom of page three under "Quiz #1." Low Self-Confidence Part of defining self-confidence is thinking about what low self-confidence is, what it looks and sounds like. Test yourself now. Circle the statements that convey a lack of self-confidence. 1. "I may be wrong, but I think the answer is ten." 2. "Thank you for the compliment. We're very proud of our work." 3. "That was really stupid of me." 4. "I forgot my business cards. I left them in the car." 5. (Responding to a compliment) "Oh, I've had this dress for ten years." 6. "I would have gotten into the program, but they don't like to take people with my background." 7. "That sounds like a challenge. I'm sure we can figure out how to solve it, though." 8. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but I wonder if I could have a minute of your time." Compare your answers to those listed at the bottom of page three under "Quiz #2." Where Does Self-Confidence Come From? Self-confidence is not something people are born with. It results from a combination of factors: 1. Learned skill: Self-confidence is a combination of skills, not just a single quality. People are not born with it or without it. It can be learned. 2. Practice: Self-confidence comes from practice. It may appear to be spontaneous, but it isn't. 3. Internal locus of control: Self-confidence results from what psychologists call an internal locus (central point) of control. This means that people who are self-directing, who accept responsibility for their own results, have greater self-confidence. 8 Self-Confidence Builders There are many concrete, specific things you can do to feel more confident in challenging life situations. Make note of those that will help you develop your own sense of self-confidence. 1. Follow your strengths. Self-confidence comes from being the best "you" possible. It doesn't come from trying to be someone else. It is the result of following paths like these: ? Do what comes naturally. ? Develop your talents. ? Follow your convictions. ? Express your own style. 2. Plan ahead. Many people are surprised to hear that self-confidence comes from something as ordinary as planning. But think about it; let's say you are going on a job interview, almost always an anxiety-producing experience. When you are prepared, you feel more confident. 3. Take action. Confidence comes from taking action. Break your challenge down into small steps and take that first step, no matter how small it seems. 4. Study. The more you know about your subject, the more confident you will feel. In fact, the lack of self-confidence almost always stems from a lack of information. We've all had that sick feeling that we don't fully understand what we are talking about. 5. Act the part. The following tips will help you begin to present yourself in a positive way. ? Find a role model. Look for someone who is already successful in your field. Observe him or her and identify for yourself what behaviors convey self-confidence. ? Look and act powerful. Watch people who create a powerful impression. It could be a TV anchor, a character in a movie, or a coworker. Imagine yourself behaving in a similar way. For an example, watch the movie Top Hat. Fred Astaire exudes confidence. ? Be aware of nonverbal behavior that detracts from presenting yourself with confidence. Ask for feedback from a trusted friend or watch yourself on videotape. 6. Rehearse for success. One of the most important ways to boost your self-confidence is by rehearsing important conversations and presentations. You can never be too prepared. These ideas will help you practice so that you really understand your subject: ? Manage your anxiety. Feeling anxious is normal when you are in a challenging situation. The key is learning to manage anxiety so it doesn't paralyze you or diminish your effectiveness. ? Get organized. When your materials are prepared and well-organized, you will feel better about your ability to access them. Having information scattered in too many places makes you feel out of control and undermines your self-confidence. 7. Persist. Self-confidence is the result of a lot of hard work. The process takes time. It has been said that success is 99% persistence and 1% talent. 8. Enjoy your success. When you reach your goal, don't forget to give yourself credit for working hard. Be proud of what you've accomplished. Here are some ways you can do this: ? Look in the mirror and say to yourself, "Good work. I'm proud of you." ? Think of a way to reward yourself. ? Tell others about your success. ? Write yourself a letter or explore your accomplishment in your journal. ? Draw a picture expressing your achievement. Answers to Quiz #1 Items 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 9, and 10 are generally signs of self-confidence. The others could be seen as self-sabotaging behaviors. Answers to Quiz #2 Items 1, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 8 communicate low self-confidence. (Of course, there are no 100% right answers, since many of the statements depend on context, tone of voice, cultural interpretation, and other factors.) Garrett Coan is a professional therapist,coach and psychotherapist. His two Northern New Jersey office locations are accessible to individuals who reside in Bergen County, Essex County, Passaic County, Rockland County, and Manhattan. Garrett also offers online and telephone coaching and counseling services for those who live at a distance. He can be accessed through http://www.creativecounselors.com or at 201-303-4303.
MORE RESOURCES:
Coaching - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Its Story Time! - Find the Power Within, or The Truth About Dogs I heard a story recently, and wanted to share it with you. It goes something like this:Once upon a time. Developing Will Power and Self Discipline Most people admire and respect strong individuals, who have won great success by manifesting will power and self discipline. They admire people, who with sheer will power, self discipline and ambition, have improved their life, learned new skills, overcame difficulties and hardships, reduced their weight, rose high in their chosen field or advanced on the spiritual path. What Can Be Changed In Management To Improve Bottom Line Results? If you don't have the full support and understanding of key management positions, any organizational changes being made are going to be thwart with difficulties. It is up to CEOs and Presidents to champion the cause and ensure their managerial teams are also in full support, so that it can filter down through the ranks more smoothly. The Biggest Loser I am a "Loser". You're gonna learn from this writing today the reason why you too must be a "Loser". A Christmas Wish My sister is a woman now beginning her thirties. She has had few friends and her boyfriends have never been good for her. Say Adios to the Fear of Rejection! Do you ever get an uncomfortable feeling in your stomach when you have to approach someone?In situations like this does your mind go blank?This is not unusual. That feeling is often the fear of rejection. The Role of Grief Group Facilitators Technically, there are two types of grief groups. Informational and support groups are for individuals who have an interest in the grief process. 7 Effective Ways To Boost Your Self Esteem 1. Get a life purpose statement. The Enchantment of Tribes to Belong To I am remembering and have a desire to share with you, a beautiful story told to me by a young lady. It was the end of the World War II and her dad was returning home. Dont Be Jealous - Be Inspired When we see people do things we cannot do, or have things we don't have, it might be tempting to be a little jealous. But, jealousy doesn't lead to anything except resentment, and that isn't going to help you. Free Advice From Albert Einstein What If You Could Ask Anyone For Help?Have you ever noticed how sometimes you are at your most creative when you are interacting with another person? You and your friend or acquaintance feed off of each other's ideas and help each other clarify things. Well what about those times when you are alone, or you have no one you wish to share your ideas with? What can you do then to stimulate creative thought and to find elegant solutions to your problems? You could try talking to Albert Einstein. Successful Change Starts With A Shift In Perspective Like so many in corporate America today, Susan needed more balance in her life-but she did not know how to get it. Faced with a 60-hour work week and a lengthy daily commute, Susan was left with little time for outside interests. Why Pacing and Leading is for Wimps! Okay, you have read some books on body language and they all said you must mirror and match, pace and lead.. Living On Purpose The purpose of life is to live a life of purpose. Those individuals who live their lives 'on purpose' are not prone to wondering what the meaning and purpose of their life is. Gullibles Travels A journey by a web-footed gull through a sea of sharks.Definitions:Gull - a dupe, a fool; vulnerable to deceive; to trick; to defraud. An Example of Allowing a Desire to Arrive on Its Own I don't know why, but it seems we trip over the "allowing" part of the Deliberate Attraction formula more often than the other two parts. The Deliberate Attraction formula gives us a simple description of how to leverage the Law of Attraction so we can attract more of what we DO want and enjoy. Living In The Now I hope you are sitting down as you read this! You cannot begin to work on this kind of subject without addressing the subject of time itself - and when was the last time you did that?There are three basic areas or modules of time that are most commonly referred to:1)The Past 2)The Present 3)The FutureWhat I would like to do is have you work out where the "present" is though. In the time it has taken you to read just those last few words, that space in time that we might refer to as the present has gone. Do You Want to Make More Money as A Life Coach There's a lot of coaches out there not making any money, looking for opportunities, trying to model what others are doing, networking like crazy, researching, visualizing, affirming and hoping? yes, hoping that the clients show up before the bailiffs.I've been involved in Marketing and PR and worked with and met the good, the bad and the ugly of the coaching world and can honestly say if you are not making any money there is probably a reason why that I can help you with. Success Coaching - What Bill Gates and You Should Have In Common He was just a teenager, but he was already displaying the powerful habits that would one day make him a billionaire.I had to dart down to Atlanta on Monday for a business meeting with a partner of mine and grabbed a new book to read on the plane. How To Give Criticism Without Bruising Egos As responsible employers, parents, and friends, we have an obligation to correct the mistakes of other people in order to enhance their personal success. The task before us is how to correct a deficiency without damaging the delicate ego that can sometimes get in the way.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |
