| |
| |
|
Inspirational Information |
|
|
|
How To Be Secure In An Insecure World
Most of us believe that our happiness and security are dependent upon our relationships, work, income and the external events that take place in our lives. When things are going well there is a sense of well-being and safety. We sleep well at night, wake up feeling refreshed and have the sense that the world can be managed - that we are in control. However, this kind of security is fleeting. As people and events are constantly changing, we are often edgy about what's coming down the road. We then spend our time and energy trying to manage and control ourselves and others. This craze to control takes many forms. It produces anxiety that never seems to dissolve and turns into addictions, compulsions, catastrophic thinking. It leads to difficult, unhappy relationships based upon power struggles. No matter how much we attempt to strategize and organize, life itself often has its own plans and ideas. When we cannot accept this, our life then soon becomes an endless struggle, rather than a source of joy. We become unable to go with the turn of the tide that life's changes brings and discover the new momentum that may be coming our way. Most of the time it is fear that stops us. We long to live in the known, predict what will happen, to be able to respond in familiar ways. What we seek what is actually a false security, based upon keeping everything the same. But as the very nature of life is change, sooner or later our efforts must always fail. The more we cling to what has been, the more real security eludes us. True security, the ability to live without fear, comes from being in touch with and trusting the one within who The One Who Knows Deep within each of us, there is a knowing and resilient part of ourselves who is able to respond full, know what to do when the moment arises and is at ease and filled with good will. This part of ourselves is filled with balance and creativity. As we contact this aspect of ourselves, bring it to light, give it time and attention, we become less affected by external circumstances and our life takes a completely different turn. There is a process involved in connecting with and nurturing this part of ourselves, steps to take. These steps are directed to letting of that which is in the way. We start by un-learning some of what we've based our lives upon. Different individuals will resonate to different parts of the process. That is fine. Each step when done completely will take a person where they need to be. Here are some basic, initial steps and principles in this wonderful journey to the center of a life of balance and trust. A) Returning Home - To begin, rather than racing forward, we stop and turn around. Some call this returning to our original nature. We describe this step as Returning Home. Rather than continue our frantic search for pleasure, wealth, love, well being in the external world, we return home to ourselves. We take back our attention and return it to who, what and where we are at this very moment. As we do this a centeredness, balance and simplicity takes the place of the upheaval we live with most of the time. This step is based upon the principle that difficulties we encounter do not arise from that which is going on outside of us, but from the way we react and respond. As we return home and become aware, our reactivity lessens and natural balance and wisdom takes its place. Returning home can include times of walking, meditation, centering, focussing, journalling. All of these have the common denominator of placing our attention within. This not only restores our energy, but significantly reduces the endless spin of catastrophic thinking most of us engage in. As we do this we notice it is the catastrophic thinking itself that makes us uneasy, not the actual events right before us now. B)Letting Go Of False Expectations Our fear of life and need to control is often fuelled by the disappointments we have suffered. Over and over we try to make things work out according to our desires. We may not see that many of these dashed expectations and desires, are simply fantasies, dreams, hopes and demands we've placed upon others. When our personal wishes are not fulfilled, resentment and fear develop. Often we do not see that our wishes may have little to do with what is real - or what is beneficial for ourselves or others. As we release our expectations, we become able to see and accept the world as it is and find a new way of living in it. We find who we are, where we belong and where our true security lay. Many then become amazed at how light, joyous and at ease they feel - and at the abundance of beauty and goodness that has always been available to them, day by day. We also begin to see that - "The world is a womb, not a tomb, a place where everything is engendered and brought to life." Henry Miller cc/Dr Shoshanna/2005 Dr. Brenda Shoshanna, http://www.brendashoshanna.com, is author of LIVING BY ZEN, (Timeless Truths For Everyday Life), http://www.livingbyzen.com. A psychologist, long term Zen practitioner, speaker and workshop leader she offers talks and workshops on finding our inner security and fulfillment. Dr. Shoshanna also speaks on all aspects of relationships and living life to the brim. She is the author of ZEN MIRACLES (Finding Peace In An Insane World, Wiley, and ZEN AND THE ART OF FALLING IN LOVE, (Simon and Schuster). She is the relationship on i.village and can be reached at topspeaker@yahoo.com, (212) 288-0028.
MORE RESOURCES:
Inspirational - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Finding Inspiration to Realise Your Dreams and Ambitions "Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great. The Finer, and Finest, Things in Life In America, we have a saying: The finer things in life. These are the things that most people talk about when they are speaking of thing of high quality. Coming To Your Senses, Again and Again! When we talk about the Enchanted Self we are referring to positive states of mind and body that are unique to each of us. We are also referring to the process by which we tap into our Enchanted Self. From The Ashes The man plopped down on his chair, defeated.His father's maxims bit his ears and nagged him like tired Christmas jingles. Silence Inside Silence means no voice input of any sort. What happens when there is silence? We cannot hear anything from the outside, but the voices inside are what we hear pretty clearly. A Feline Example On Courage Fangs. Killer claws. Naomi and the 5 Life Lessons Not long ago, I attended a seminar that featured Naomi Judd, half of the legendary country music duo, The Judds. Naomi, with her talented daughter, Wynonna, set the standard for country music by selling millions of albums, performing to 'sold out' audiences, and winning numerous awards. Attitude Adjustment "If you are pained by external things, it is not they that disturb you, but your own judgment of them. And it is in your power to wipe out that judgment now. Everyone Has Been Hurt... Part 4 Continued.. The Thief of Fulfillment Why does this happen?It's all to do with the way the subconscious perceives survival. It knows that you are in a safe position and that survival is more or less guaranteed if you carry on in the same way. The Women At The Cross (Reflections On The Death And Resurrection Of Jesus) The women at the cross. Have you ever thought about them?Why not drift into a comfortable - and meditative - position on a coach or in a chair and read verses 40 and 41 in Mark, chapter 15?When I read those words, one of my first thoughts was "Gutsy!" I would not have wanted to watch. Melting Snow I love the sounds of melting snow-plink, plink, ting, ting, ting, a staccato drip on sloped metal roofs, the occasional loud crack of a giant icicle, the bubble and gurgle of the mountain brook as it swells and tumbles over polished rocks on its way to the valley below.I love to gaze at the majestic white peaks with knowing wonder that they will soon morph into greens, oranges, purples, reds and a myriad of ever-changing hues, a dance between the sun, the clouds and the fog, a waltz of beauty and color that never changes partners yet never replays itself, each day a masterful original. Fulfilling Your Dreams: The Magic Of Starting Fulfilling your dreams will remain a mirage if you simply sit down and dream on.You may have a dream of attaining financial freedom to go after your dreams, instead of doing what you have to do, to get bills paid and put food on the table. Alone But Not Lonely In today's fast paced society, we've become accustomed to filling the eeriness of silence with fluff. We turn to many distractions as a means of escaping feelings of idleness or boredom. Impaired Judgment Direct Answers - Column for the week of September 23, 2002My husband has a twofold addiction problem, drinking and drugs. In the six years we have been married, he has had periods of sobriety, but they don't ever last. By Now, Im an Expert at Memory Loss I sat down to write my weekly humor column, but I just could not remember what I wanted to write about. This seems to be an increasingly more common affliction, ever since I turned 40. Oldies Direct Answers - Column for the week of January 5, 2004I am a captain in the Marine Corps. A year ago my wife cheated on me with another Marine. Moral Obligation & Responsibility Chances are you have seen some type of disturbance in your lifetime. Whether it was a bully picking on someone or a piece of trash on the ground, disturbances happen daily on several different levels. The Importance of Friendship My students and clients have constantly heard me stress that our Martial Art is more than just a physical discipline; that it is a discipline that develops both the mind and body. This is so important that Soke Masaaki Hatsumi, the grand master of our lineages, has made it the primary thrust of just about every one of his books about Ninpo and Martial Arts in general. Wake-Up Call Direct Answers - Column for the week of October 7, 2002In the first half of May, I went through two remarkable changes. One was physical and the other involved emotional recall.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |
